I have Issues

Last Monday I picked up the September issue of O magazine. In the back there was an article written by Cintra Wilson titled "An Inconvenient Youth". The article highlighted a group of friends who talk openly about their experiences. For the most part I thought the piece was honest, fair and thoughtful. I felt more connected because happily I found that Dr. Robert Naseef and Cindy Ariel were also included. Years ago, an essay I wrote was included in their book "Voices From The Spectrum" and it was wonderful to see their work recognized in the most natural a setting, amongst a group of friends. But I did have a bit of an issue with a few things written and here is the reason why.......
We are a special needs family. For the past 7 years Autism set up shop in my home, claiming my son Gabe. It has been a tug of war trying to get back the "typically developing" son we lost after vaccinations...yes I said it...vaccinations...... For every step forward, we have taken 2 steps back...The Autism Cha Cha Cha.....After 5 different neurologists, 1 being the head Pediatric Neurologist at Stony Brook Hospital at the time, told me to place my son on a waiting list for an institution and in the meantime while I wait, medicate him, I decided to take my search for help and answers elsewhere.
My son was put in a special ed classroom in a 6-1-1- setting. Through the years he had ABA (applied Behavioral analysis), VB (Verbal Behavior) tons of OT, listening programs, Floortime (DIR) RDI (Relationship Development Intervention). When he was placed in the 8-1-1 Autism program in our public school, I began the biomedical approach. Now, I am the quintessential neurotic New Yorker who must research everything before I go into it, so trust me when I say the decision was a well thought out one. It was also the one where I began to see glimpses of the child I once had. The Biomedical route is one that has a specific protocol attached to it. The treatments are given by DAN (Defeat Autism Now) Doctors who are familiar with the medical symptons our children face. They are not snake oil salespeople selling fluff and stuff. I had my son thoroughly evaluated, hair, blood, urine and feces sent to labs, and the results came back that he had high levels of heavy metal toxins in his systems, the highest being mercury. He also was allergic to and had many food sensitivities. We changed his diet, added vitamins and supplements that he was deficient in, we had him chelated, and he went from being almost nonverbal (had very few words and would not say more than 2 at a time) to being able to focus, sit still for an hour at a time, say 10 word sentences and have normal bowel movements for the first time in years. The following year he was able to be placed in an inclusion kindergarten class.We then proceeded to try the Brain Balance program and it was wonderful therapy. Granted, it's all ridiculously expensive to the point of being obscene, and it shouldn't be the case. It should be more affordable and accessible. We have refinanced our home in order to pay for many of these treatments, but it was a chance we were willing to take.
Here is the issue I have, no matter where your child falls on the spectrum, we should be in this together. If I learned anything at the start of this journey is question everything, always follow the money, check ingredients to everything from the food we put on the table to the vaccines we inject into our bodies to the products we clean and paint our homes with. We need to nurture what nourishes us. We need to be vigilant about laws put in place that could hurt or undermine our kids. We need to be respectful of one another and our experiences. While I understand the frustrations many parents of older children who have tried so many different approaches have with Jenny McCarthy and Generation Rescue, it is unfair to be so dismissive of the work they do. My son was diagnosed a few years before hers and I was on TACA NOW & Generation Rescue and Autism Research Institute, Safe Minds, NAA before she ever came onto the scene. It was important for so many of us then, and now. To also state that vaccines have nothing to do with Autism is incorrect. They have not been able to rule it out in independent studies. Again it is always important to see who funds the studies.
Our children are here now and there has to be a focus on how we can help them achieve their potential, that should also be on the forefront. A fair shot at life for so many who can soar given the opportunity should be our priority.
Acceptance is always the first step towards healing, whatever you chose that word to mean for you. It's the first step towards an honest discussion, it's the first step towards finding solutions. Acceptance stems beyond our community, beyond our situation. Acceptance does not mean conformity, it means recognition, acknowledgment...isn't that what we all want for our children?
I have come to accept my son's Autism, but I also know that just because he has a disorder, doesn't make him one. My monumental task as a mother is to make sure that Gabe is not defined by his Autism, but by the undeniable traits that make him the exceptional, funny, bright,
loving, persistent, courageous boy that he is. He has come such a long way, but still has many, many hurdles ahead of him....
The new stats are in, 1 in 100 are now diagnosed with Autism. It's a new day people, lets learn to accept, respect and demand better for our children, for our world, for our earth.........