In grade school we were given the proverbial half empty, half full question. I'll never forget it, it's one of those moments when you can't help but sing in your head, "one of these things is not like the others, one of these things just doesn't belong"...then not only do you realize it's you, but everyone else does as well....
I went to a catholic parochial school, which automatically scars you for life, at least it did me...stigmata...
Anyway, I was in 4th grade and Mrs. Perrone held up a cup and said "imagine this cup was filled half way, would you say it was half empty or half full?"...Everyone was giving their answers and when she got to me I was stumped. I could tell she was starting to lose her patience when she snapped at me, "listen, how hard could this be you have 2 choices"..... so I blurt out, " but how am I supposed to answer that if I don't know what's in the cup, and if I don't know how thirsty I am? What if there is something I hate? I'd have to be real thirsty to think that half full, and if it were something I loved, it wouldn't be enough...and what if I wasn't thirsty at all? What if it was just right, the perfect amount?..." and before I could keep going on with the rant, she pulled me out of the room to yell at me for giving, in her words, a very stupid answer...she told me to focus and stop over thinking everything, that there were only 2 answers, and I would have to write a paper giving one of the 2 and have it to her by the next day......
The reason why I bring this up today is because I was flipping channels and there was a discussion about how an optimistic attitude verses a pessimistic one from both the patient and the caretaker can make a difference in the health of someone battling a chronic condition or a terminal one. That a positive outlook was important for quality of life. And while I can see that; as a realist I have to question, is it a mom looking at the life of her child with special needs, and the very real obstacles in the child's way from their basic rights as a human being to their basic rights as citizens? Or is it a daughter or son of an Alzheimers patient, or a spouse of someone with ALS? Or anyone watching a loved one deteriorate and suffer....Because the support you receive from the environment you have to live in, school districts, doctors, specialists, insurance companies, research, friends and extended family, community, that all matters, that all makes a difference. Not all diseases and disorders were created equally, or have equal support systems in place, or have the answers necessary to make a difference to real quality of life.... Would they see that proverbial cup as being half empty or half full, or would they at that point just focus on what's inside that cup and learn to savor it and make it last as long as possible? Or in my case, hand it over to my son with about 25 different vitamins and supplements and hope that it helps him.
I believe hope carries more weight when there is thought behind it, and even more so when there is a strong communal sustenance. Even the optimist needs the right support to be able to continue to feed it's positive addiction, I mean attitude. It's never as easy as a cup half empty or half full...and if life outside of the 4th grade taught me anything Mrs. Perrone, it's that there is rarely ever only 2 answers, if you really think about it, even the optimists and the pessimists know that........and if you knock a kid over enough, she/he won't be half empty or half full, just totally screwed up.....
Now, I'll tell you what a cup filled half way means...you have to finish pouring... toast to your health, to the health of your loved ones, and hope we find a way to give coverage to all......
A votre sante
No comments:
Post a Comment