Shout out to my Special Needs Mom's

Last year I wrote to a yahoo group I belong to, the NSASA (Nassau/Suffolk Autism Society of America) to wish all the moms a Happy Mother's Day....
I was asked by a few moms that I know to please re post it again, and while I will, this is also for every mom who raises a child with special needs...
Happy Mothers Day............



As you all know:
When your child is diagnosed, you quickly learn that everything you thought you knew, trusted, understood, needed to be redefined, rethought, reprocessed. You learn to question everything and everyone. You learn to research, to dig deep into resources that go beyond the financial, the physical, the emotional, the intellectual....

You learn to reach out to a community of parents that have been collecting information and sharing experiences that prove to be as valuable, and in most cases, more valuable than anything any professional could advise you.

Everything that you might have dreamt motherhood would be about is buried alongside everything you had imagined your childs life might be like.

Here's the thing I'm learning through it all.....

My love for my child has never needed to be redefined. With every doctor visit, every evaluation, every CSE meeting or IEP, with every therapy, treatment, program, protocol, camp, special needs extracurricular activity...with every "near" normal life experience, comes the very real experience of loving and being loved in a very unique way, in the most profound way.

Everything that I thought motherhood would look like might have been dramatically altered, but everything motherhood means has been heightened tenfold.

When your child is diagnosed you quickly learn that you have to fight for that childs right to be a child, and to be counted....

And then you realize just how much it counts when it becomes clear to you that hope too, is a complete sensory experience.

So, to all you moms who I know fight so hard for your beautiful children, enjoy your Mothers Day, I hope it's a happy one.

Your Sorority Sister,
Maribel

Special Olympics, Extraordinary Athletes

This past winter, when my family sat together to watch the Opening Ceremony for the Olympic Games, Gabe was mesmerized. "The world is marching together" he said, completely taken by the flags, the cheering crowds, the banners, the waving, and the smiling faces he saw flash across the screen. There were the inspiring stories, of dedication, of going against all odds, doting parents who sacrificed so much to help their children achieve their goals. All this set to background music that would make the most cynical release doubts like butterflies........

By the time March rolled around, word was sent that the Special Olympics would be coming to our area, and a team was being put together. Gabe was absolutely thrilled. Special Olympics to me, virgin to the actual experience, was a tremendous organization built by the Shriver/ Kennedy clan and embraced by a global community. To Gabe, Special Olympics meant a chance to march with the world, waving, banners in hand, smiling......Sign me up, he said, and for 2 months, he practiced with his team, ran the 50 & 100 meter dash, and dreamed big.

What many people who may be familiar with the Special Olympics but who may not have a special athlete in their lives yet, do not realize is just how layered this experience really is. The coaches volunteer their limited time, parents come together to help out the kids, siblings assist in the coaching, it is grass roots at it's finest. Those of us who live within the confines of extraordinary circumstances quickly learn to think beyond limitations and tune out nay sayers. Those of us who love people whose challenges truly redefine "quality of life", understand just how important it is to honor thier spirits, their humanity, and highlight their dedication and perserverance.
And so, on May 2, 2010, we made our way to Brentwood highschool. Gabe's cheering squad, friends and family, banners in hand, came out to see him race.

Here is where I struggle to find the words to describe just what it feels like to sit in the stands with strangers and find that the affinity of happenstance easily replaces names....To watch the parade of Athletes, each group representing thier schools or organizations, walk proudly, enthusiastically waving and completely reveling in their moment is breath taking. Around you families float with emotions as they cheer these joyous people on...The accomplishment worn on the faces of the athletes even before the start of a race brings you to your feet, simply because you have witnessed and understand thier journey. Everyone there is absolutely supportive of every individual competing. Sportsmanship, real honest sportsmanship is what every athelete on that field personifies. Doesn't matter how fast you get past that finish line, all that matters is that you get past it. So you root, and you clap, and you yell, and a tear or two wells up, and you know as you watch those faces light up that all this matters. Celebrations matter. People matter. Support matters. Community matters. Family matters. Spirit matters. Humanity matters. Compassion matters. It's what unites us, it's what connects us, it's what lifts us, it's what makes us all special.

So, While I was watching my son get his medal, I silently thought of and thanked Eunice Kennedy Shriver and her unbelievably generous spirit. I thought of Rose Marie Kennedy and the impact she had on her siblings. I thought of Ted Kennedy and all he fought hard for...one family's life experience and the imprint it has had on all our lives, because they loved thier sister, and felt she deserved better. All our children do.

Here's to all our Special Olympians, to all our heros, to all those who remind us what real courage is , and who wear it proudly on their faces as they cross the finish line........

Way to go Gabe.....you are a winner...............